APRIL 2018
Daijha Morrow:
Emotional, Spiritual, and Social Wellness
Raise your hand if you have felt personally victimized by the internship search process.
I know that I, like many others, would be one of the first people to shoot my hand high in the air. This constant cycle of over- stressing, worrying, and coming up with 70 “Plan B” action plans in the case that I spend my summer without an internship has been brutal.
Now, raise your hand if it seems like your best friend does not have to go through any of the same stresses as you.
Yes, one of your friends.
The one who seems to have everything together. Their internship has been lined up since the winter semester, and their whole career (and future) just seems bright - brighter than yours for sure.
You begin to make comparisons in your head, hoping to find something wrong with that individual or even worse- something better about yourself. “She gets everything,” you sigh to yourself or “Why am I so unlucky,” you sigh again.
It’s a certain bitterness that permeates through friendships that inevitably ruins them. You find yourself trying to find any and everything that could be wrong with them, finding that your irritation lasts a little longer than usual or gets a little bit more intense each time they talk about their perfect situation.
What is this called?
Envy. Jealousy. Covetousness.
The truth is, everyone’s pathway and journey is different. It’s useless to compare journeys because at the end of the day, we are each called here for our own individualized and special purpose. We are all fearfully and wonderfully created and crafted, and realizing the beauty we hold and becoming more confident in who God made us to be is the first step towards reaching complete satisfaction with who we are made to be.
So why don’t we try uplifting our friends- being genuinely happy for them, and celebrating their success as if it were our own. There is already enough negativity in the world that women of color have to face, why not be each other’s biggest supporters?
The internship process can be stressful, yes, but what is the purpose of engulfing ourselves in the never- ending cycle of comparison? Content and comparison cannot exist in the same territory. Where there is comparison, there is unhealthy satisfaction - a lust for something more that can never be achieved.
In this upcoming season, we need to water and nurture each other to produce growth. Ask yourself, am I a weed or a gardener? And if you find yourself unable to be fully happy for your friends, reevaluate your level of confidence in yourself. Remind yourself that you are here for a special purpose that will be fulfilled when it is your time! Don’t find contentment in someone else’s journey. Find contentment in knowing that every day you are one step closer to fulfilling your uniquely crafted, God- given purpose.
A win for one of us is a win for us all.