Summer Damra: It's Beauty in the Struggle, Ugliness in the Success
September 2017
When something happens to you during the school year that falls directly into the “bad” category in your mind, try to reflect on why you’ve perceived it as bad, and what expectations you had of life that lead you to this negative thought process. What we consider ‘bad’ and ‘good’ is subjective to the physical and spiritual dimensions we live in; these tend to be the historical time period(s) and current culture(s) we’re immersed in, what we value and take pride in, and the strength of our connection to God. Despite what you might think is good or bad for you, it all relates back to how we generally see life as.
If you perceive life on this world as a means to only emotionally, mentally, and physically experience the things that give you the most pleasure in a superficial matter, then you will find it most difficult to adapt and change to the demands of the universe. However, if you see life as the natural systems around us-a select moment in time to simply grow, find our niche in the worlds of our own and others, and gain an understanding of ourselves and God-then we can achieve a state of gratitude and happiness, overcome our worldly perceptions of good and bad, and transform every time our souls drink from the river of growth.
Human beings tend to think that we should constantly be like the taproots of a White Oak tree, grounded and unchanging, in the face of wild and ravish winds. However, we must realize, it is easier and better for ourselves, in that particular moment, to unravel our roots and become one with the furiously wild winds. Whether we like it or not, we must take the bittersweet pill of life to encourage small or large transformations.
Growth also takes on many shapes and forms and may not correlate with society’s perception of positive growth. Our personal definition of positive growth tends to correlate with what we fantasize, whether subconsciously or consciously, as a “better” version of ourselves, bodies, life partners, personalities, successes, families, and public and academic personas. Life simply does not follow your plan, your fantasy, your expectations, and even your values of justice. How you perceive the results, consequences, and actions of others is the only form of control you have in this world, but this power will unlock you from the chains of life’s programming of what is good and bad, success and failure, and most importantly your own plans, fantasies, and expectations. Freedom exists in your state of mind.
“Always gon’ be a bigger house somewhere, but feel me
Long as the people in that motherfu*ker love you dearly….
But you ain’t never gon’be happy till you love yours”
The larger external systems of oppression in this world do not want you to realize that your happiness is within your state of acceptance and gratitude and not in their hands. The physical world tries to convince you that happiness is rooted in the physicality of everything. There’s this idea that true love purely exists in the kisses and flowers of lovers or that success is only accrued through the act of possessing power, things, people, and ideas. Through my own experiences and reflections, I’ve realized that the physical state of everything does not matter. Whatever your life may seem on the outside in a superficial sense, it does not reflect your soul or state of heart.
“For what’s money without happiness?
Or hard times without the people you love?
Though I am not sure what’s ‘bout to happen next
I asked for strength from the Lord up above”
This may all seem very theoretical, but I dare you to see the world in this perspective for at least a minute. In that single minute, you will realize all of the small things you worry about-your grades, body size, acceptance, and the future-will dissipate and leave you with only you.
As you hustle to complete the mundane tasks of work and school, take the time to realize that we’re simply beyond those tasks. We’re larger, you and me, than what the eye can take in, what our hands can feel, what our ears can pick up, and what our mouths can taste. Take the opportunity of today to break away from the reactionary world, and see yourself and others beyond the storms that hit our coasts. I promise you; it will leave you not wanting to look back and loving all the edges and curves that make up you and your life.
“No such thing as a life that’s better than yours
No such thing as a life that’s better than yours”
-J Cole (Love Yourz)
Take five minutes today to simply reflect on one of these topics:
Realistic steps to expand your mind
Reflect on what comes to mind
Reflect on what you value and take pride in
Reflect on what you desire and why you particularly desire it
Reflect on an event that you perceive as a “down/mishap” in your life and think about why you may perceive it as such
Reflect on your expectations
Reflect on your connection with God