November 2019
What I Am Thankful for: Choosing to Love
By: Michaela Minnis
As the youngest sibling in my family sometimes I felt ignored; I was told that I had too much to say too often, and that I needed to be careful when expressing my opinion. Honestly, I blame my father. He made it okay to speak up and be proud about one’s words because he was the same way. Never holding back, nor having a filter, the rest of my family could never get a word in edgewise because he would either chase us around the house to explain something he read or sing some songs he heard on the radio; I was never interested, but I did appreciate his enthusiasm about wanting to be heard. I took after this quickly as a way to validate my willingness to speak.
Although I saw my parents having the ability to speak their minds whether they were yelling at me to do chores during the weekends, or scolding me about sharing the remote control with my brother, it was not a green light for me to say whatever I wanted. Deemed as a young girl who had too much to say, I eventually just silenced myself as a way to protect myself. Once I surrounded myself with powerful women in high school and college, I felt more empowered to speak up for myself. And for this reason, I am thankful for the women, both friends and family, in my life.
Having women around me that care about my well-being and motivate me everyday is something I have learned to not take for granted. First, I am thankful for my mother for sacrificing much of herself and her aspirations; I hope one day I can repay her. Next, I am thankful for all of my aunts and grandmothers because they have had a huge hand in raising me; though distance ranges from close to far away, I know I can count on them to hype me up on Facebook in the comments’ section. My women friends that I met at Michigan have had a lasting impact on me; they are all intelligent, ambitious, and are some of the few people I know that will travel across campus just to cry together when we are stressed out - I didn’t think this was possible before coming to college.
I am thankful for the time one of my friends walked to my residence hall to bring me EcoStyler; she truly saved my life. I am thankful for the random check-ins I have with my friends where we end up crying, without forgetting to wipe one another’s tears. I am thankful for Stats 250 study sessions last semester even though I think most of the time my friends and I were staring at each other until the material finally clicked. Most importantly, I am thankful for the conversations I have with these women ranging from our experiences as black women going to a predominantly white institution to what we should order for dinner that night even though we vowed to not spend money that same day. Also, I appreciate my friends for hearing my rants about my bad days (that usually turn into tangents about the evils of capitalism).
This Holiday season of thankfulness, gratitude, and appreciation feels different because I have learned so much this year from the women who choose to love me every day. Friendship is a choice, and I am thankful that my friends choose to love every part of me, and I choose to love them right back.